Tuesday, September 13, 2011
"Today's shocks are tomorrow's conventions"- Carolyn Heilburn
So this quote is really important to me. There are tons of books about the feminist movement and how women can have it all... be perfect wives, mothers, and businesswomen. Although I love working outside of the home, I cannot help but reflect on my childhood and the amount of time I spent with my mother and grandmother. Those were the most fond memories I have. Riding bikes with the neighborhood kids, hearing the sound of my mother's voice calling me home when it started to get dark outside, picking food from my grandmothers garden and smelling the scent of fresh peppermint from my grandmothers purse after having brunch at the local lunch counter where my aunt work. The simple life, the good life. This leads to think, is is so bad to want to be a stay at home mom? To want to focus on raising your family? To expand this thought beyond family life I reflect on the social situations we have allowed to progress in our society. During a sermon this summer our pastor spoke on how or society (the US particularly) is so self-centered that we keep burying ourselves: in debt, lack of morals leading us astray from God. Why do we have to keep pushing the envelope? What are we trying to prove? I ask myself these questions too... what are you trying to prove? Who are you trying prove? Is it really worth it? I have always felt this pressure to be... everything. At first it was a motivator to keep going when things were really hard when I thought I would fail. Now its just feels like a burden. I have accomplished a lot in a relatively short amount of time but I still feel unfulfilled. As I think about these questions, I also go back to a quote from somewhere that "you are who God says you are." I am not sure what that is for me as of now. I know what I am naturally drawn to do but I really don't know who God thinks I am... what He wants me to do... I think I need to spend some intimate time with Him to figure this out.